The start of fall always reminds me of love. I met my boyfriend last October. The start of our relationship was made all the more exciting by the coming holidays. We got to know each other fast as I got a sneak peek into his sillier side, watching him dress up as the singer Pitbull, and then again as another singer, Freddy Mercury. Later, I got a sense of his love for food when Thanksgiving came around and he ate himself sick. At Christmas time, I watched him build stockings for everyone he loved, and I got one too.
To fall in love in any season is a scary thing. It means to love Cerberus, the mythological demon dog at the gates of Hell, and sit in his mouth as you feed him, your hand reaching down to the end of his tongue and dropping the food into darkness. You’re not quite in Hell yet, but at any point, Cerberus could bite down. And he does, but not hard enough.
The falling leaves and brisk winds that blow in as October arrives transport me back to the nerves I felt when I first met him. Since then, I’ve learned more about myself than I had ever thought possible. In the mouth of Cerberus, inscribed along the backside of his teeth, is everything you’ve ever wanted to know about yourself. Sure, being alone has its virtues, but being a partner to someone else’s life and story– to be both Cerberus and his feeder– is a skill unlike anything else.
To fall in love in the fall is the only way to fall in love. To fall in love just as the leaves fall from their branches feels almost too obvious. It’s as cliche as a typical love story can get. It’s why even the dictionary by Merriam Webster has made space in its pages for the proverbial “Cuffing Season.” Outside of the social conversation, falling in love as the weather grows colder gives your relationship a blueprint to follow; it gives you structure. If you’re new to relationships, the fall gives you training wheels. The holidays mark milestones, and the New Year is a chance to reflect and either jump into the new year together or part ways.
I met my boyfriend last October. Here we are again, a year later, greeting the month once more. In the words of the late children’s author Richard Scarry, “October is the month of falling leaves. It is fun to play in them.” I would like to add: “It is also the month to fall in love. Move over, February.”