The Impact of Mental Illness on Romantic Relationships

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Generally, when mental illness is portrayed in media, two set narratives are shown. Either these stories demonize those who are mentally ill–especially characters with disorders that are more intense and less common, such as dissociative identity disorder (DID) or borderline personality disorder (BPD)–or mentally ill characters who overcome their disorders easily and are able to move on with their lives. Both concepts are damaging, even if the latter is intended to be feel-good content. With these inherently harmful yet popular depictions of mental illness, finding accurate displays of this subject matter can feel practically impossible. However, there are some pieces of media that accurately represent mental illness, such as the song “Renegade” by musical duo Big Red Machine featuring Taylor Swift.  

This track—the third single off of Big Red Machine’s second studio album How Long Do You Think It’s Gonna Last?—follows a narrator whose partner suffers from mental health issues. These struggles have begun to impact their romantic relationship, which has caused the speaker to feel frustrated. In the song, the narrator wants to stay in the relationship but acknowledges that their partner’s mental illness needs to be addressed and managed. 

“Renegade” is comprised of multiple elements that make it a positive representation of mental illness. For one, the honesty found within the song’s lyrics do not attempt to glamorize or shame those with mental health issues. The narrator understands that the poor mental health of a partner can also take a toll on the person who is considerably more stable. But the speaker isn’t asking for their partner to change or think of them as lesser than them because of their problems; the narrator just wants their lover to start tackling their issues. The song addresses mental illness accurately rather than blaming the mentally ill person, which is a more nuanced portrayal than most pieces of media.  

Another great aspect of the song is how the speaker discusses their partner needing to get a hold of their mental state. A common trope within mental illness media is that a person with problems of this nature can be “fixed” or “saved.” This is particularly true when it comes to women, as fictional female characters are expected to change men and make them better. Instead, in the track, the narrator emphasizes that their relationship will become stronger once their partner is able to actively seek out professional help. While they care for and support their loved ones, the speaker is not responsible for their partner’s mental health. In relationships, the mentally ill person needs to help themselves to be able to actually get better.  

This candid but sensitive portrayal of mental illness expertly expresses how complicated mental health is, and how the mental states of both people in a relationship influence it. Hopefully, future entertainment centered on mental illness follows in the same vein as “Renegade.”