Futile Devices

Image via TheArgus.org

I’m one of those people who doesn’t hate Valentine’s Day, but I also don’t love it. To me, it’s just a day that occurs every year. I don’t do much on the holiday, I might exchange gifts with my best friends, but in my senior year of high school, my friend group did something different. 

Instead of exchanging gifts at school, we did it in my car before going out to eat. While we exchanged presents we played the Call Me By Your Name soundtrack, something that we were all stupidly attached to. I had listened to a few songs, mainly the popular ones like “Visions of Gideon” but that fateful Valentine’s Day I heard the most beautiful and heartbreaking song I’ve ever heard. 

“Futile Devices” by Sujan Stevens is a beautifully written song that tells the tale of unrequited love. Your love wasn’t enough, and though you still have those strong feelings for the person, you must move on. There’s nothing you can say that will get the person to stay, no matter how much you want it to be different. 

I mean, the lyric “And I would say I love you but saying it out loud is hard. So I won’t say it at all” kills me every time I listen to the song

While this perfectly describes the relationship of the characters from Call Me By Your Name, I think anyone could relate to this song, romantic or not. 

This song didn’t affect me when I was with my friends because it was a different dynamic. We were all screaming the lyrics, looking like complete fools. But when I listened to this song fairly recently after coming home from thrift shopping I burst into tears. It’s weird because I don’t relate to the song at all, but the lyrics, cadence, and Stevens’ voice all tied together you can’t help but feel affected. 

It’s odd recommending a song that will probably make you sad after listening, but it’s so beautiful that I can’t help but want everyone to experience this song. It’s only 2 minutes long, and yet it’s something that you will want to put on repeat, so it never ends. You want the feeling to stay, no matter if it’s happy or sad.